Life as process; it's a surfing thing.

Less Is Enough: A Potential Stress Reducer

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Sun, 18 Sep 2011 02:18:43 GMT

iller-Tiedeman's LifeProcess Theory & Lifecareer Philosophy offers Quantum physics principles useful in your everyday life. When Life is the big career, any topic is fair game, because life direction is not just about work. Therefore, in this post, the LifeProcess principle, less is enough, is introduced by way of a colleague's experience.

Following is an e-mail I received from a colleague. I omitted his name, as it is his learning that I want to comment on. I will make several comments about the importance of the principle, less is enough, and then I invite you to observe this in your daily experience.

Dear Anna,

I really appreciate your advising me nearly two months ago to be mindful about what I share because many will drag you through the landscapes of their emotions. If only I had learned this vital lesson much earlier in life, I would have spared myself a boatload of grief, a bucket full of tears and an untold measure of self-esteem.

Whenever I hear voices in my head telling me that I am worthless or that I can't or shouldn't do something I know to be right, I now realize that those internal voices are not mine but rather the ghosts of everyone from my past life who violated my boundaries because of the cultural permission given those in authority. If only I had trusted myself, my own emotional landscape would be a vast, open field with few barriers, few concerns, hardly any regrets.

The good news is that I finally learned what I should have learned years ago. Though I don't have any children of my own, I can pass this life-saving knowledge to the students I teach.

I think I am learning as much from my tutees, as I hope they are learning from me. I find children to be so grounding. They have no hidden agendas, no schemes. What you see is what you get. Working with them is validating. They truly reflect who I am.

In just a few moments, I need to ready myself for another challenging but fulfilling day in the community.

Take care,

So, what do I mean by less is enough? It’s this simple, less shared means less judgment. Jackie Kennedy is a good example of this. She said very little to the public during her lifetime, and people loved her. Had she been more opinionated, that may not have been the case. When you share any kind of personal information, it hits the listener’s belief system, as well as his or her emotional and intellectual landscape. This sets up two possible outcomes that are as certain as death and taxes: kudos or judgments.

Now the curious part about this is that you may, when sharing, think you haven't ruffled the feathers of your listeners. However, as time passes, they may think differently, and, if this happens in a work situation, they may go so far as to write your employer a scathing letter about it. I had that experience once when I was Director of Admissions at a small college, and a colleague (professor) experienced it once when one of her student’s wrote a scathing letter about her to the university administration.

Not long after my experience, I created a personal policy that less is enough, even down to what I share with family and friends. In the final analysis, family and friends may be better at crucifying you, as they tend to know more about you. Even if they don’t bully you, they often get the interpretation wrong.

Now let’s look at the other side. There are people who actually enjoy baring their soul. They have a tendency to like the drama and the negativity that results. So, less is enough isn’t a one-size fits all. It only fits those interested in reducing personal stress and those who don’t want to donate time to mentally rehearsing the resulting negative feedback. On the other hand, you could be one of those individuals who receive constant praise. If so, this topic isn’t for you.

Finally, the guiding vision for my LifeProcess Theory and Lifecareer Philosophy work is reduced stress. Those who choose the LifeProcess approach recognize that stress weakens immune function, and they’re not willing to donate their good health to transient personal comments.

The next time you have an opportunity, check out the less is enough principle in your experience, and let me know what you learn.

I'm Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Director of the New Careering Institute, Inc., and I welcome your comments and questions. anna@life-is-career.com

Can I share this blog with my twitter friends?

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 21:32:16 GMT

Absolutely

The economy explained in 135 seconds.

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 23:02:09 GMT

This blog addresses life direction concerns (living life-as-process), which for me is connected to everything in life, and that includes the economy. If we don’t have the potential for income, life direction withers on the vine, because expenses don't take a holiday.

Just in case you haven’t thought much about the economy, here’s a link that will explain in 135 seconds the whole story, and with some interesting art work. http://front.moveon.org/scribbling-sharpie-illustrates-the-truth-about-our-economy/?id=28091-9448386-O35EUix.

The video features Robert Reich, former Harvard University professor, who served in several presidential administrations as Secretary of Labor.

If we can’t build a strong economy, then financial literacy is off the table, and quality of life, for too many Americans, slides right off with it.

I’m Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, President of the NEW Careering Institute, Inc., and I welcome your comments and suggestions.

"Where can I read more about Benson's work?"

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Sun, 19 Jun 2011 22:27:43 GMT

Browse it on the web, then go to www.amazon.com and review the books he has written. You may be able to get some of his books at your local library.

Cheers and happy learning

Benson Relaxation Response Republished

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Mon, 30 May 2011 17:42:00 GMT

Here's A Quick Way To Improve Health and Your Life Direction
In 5 to 20 Minutes a Day

© Anna Miller-Tiedeman, 2011

Permission granted for educational use

Let's start with mindset, something most people see as empty and useless. However, recent research suggests that changing your mind can change your gene expression, which in turn changes your health. Easy? Well, not so fast. Changing your mind isn't as easy as changing shirts, but it’s worth taking a run at.

Dr. Herbert Benson, M. D., and director of the Mind/Body Institute, at Harvard University, and author of The Relaxation Response, and the new The Relaxation Revolution, says that "we now have scientific proof that the mind can heal the body." This means we do have a say in both prevention and healing of our bodies. This could reduce health costs, offer a greater sense of happiness and make us more productive. More importantly, the procedure is free. No travel to workshops or seminars required.

The nature of the relaxation response is the opposite of the fight or flight response. People who get the most out of this approach understand that mind/body healing is now rooted in scientific fact. We have known for a long time that the placebo effect (often a sugar pill) helps produce healing because the individual believes it will work. This conviction changes the physiology like any other general expectation or certainty. We know that beliefs affect political outcomes as well. Whether it is true or false, beliefs drive the decision.

^{It also happens in career development. If you think that career is only about job or profession, then connecting health to life direction doesn’t work, because your paradigm (belief) doesn’t include it. You could think about this as a complementarity approach: when you focus on one thing, you miss everything else, and this introduces both uncertainty and limited information. Driving is a great illustration. When we're preoccupied, we often miss an intended exit; and, in career development, we miss opportunities for the same reason.}

Now to the nuts-and-bolts of how you can start moving more toward a relaxed stance in life, which can produce many rewards. Think of relaxation/meditation as your Rewards Card, one that keeps on giving.

Break the train of your everyday thinking by words like love, peace, God, or words from the Lord’s prayer, shalom, ohm, hail Mary, or interrupt your day with a run, or whatever you do. Some people prefer to sit for 5 minutes each day and clear their mind. Others find this meditative state in gardening. If you start thinking during your time out, just say, “Next,” or whatever word will send the thought on.
Optimum time is 15 to 20 minutes, but five minutes will do.
You can practice this meditative state anywhere: an airport, supermarket, hair dresser, and even more creative places.
Daily practice for at least 8 weeks will change your physiology (Scientific proof on this).

I will conclude with this principle: Explanation never convinced anyone of anything.

But as a gardener, I always have hope a seed will grow. Someday, when you’re ready to stop your life for a few minutes a day, I hope you remember having read this article. .

I'm Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Director of the New Careering Institute, Inc., and I welcome your comments and questions. anna@life-is-career.com.

Perception: Room in the big tent

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Mon, 30 May 2011 16:17:00 GMT

View from my deck. Different color expressions of nature.

There’s Room in the Big Tent for All Perspectives

© Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Ph.D., 2011

Permission granted for educational use.

I have always viewed my life as my career, so I wasn’t bothered with choosing one. I intuitively knew that if I cooperated with the approaching forces, while assessing my current situation, I would find my right niche, at least for the moment. That has remained true.

As I worked professionally in the career development field, I found myself increasingly dissatisfied with focusing young people, in both middle and high school, on a future occupation. This seemed particularly odd to me, as students will have many experiences and exposures to various occupations during their public education years. Further, I don’t know too many adults who know what they will be doing too far in advance.

In short, the field of career development, as it is currently structured, is not user friendly to life, as it is doesn’t tend to take a cooperative stance with life; it forces choice too early in life. Exploration is great, but not early forced decisions. Further, career development, like psychology, appears more interested in conforming individuals to what is, rather than encouraging them to follow their inner wisdom. It’s the old notion that adults know best. Well, I don’t know about you, but I don’t believe that anyone, adult or otherwise, knows best for my life, particularly if they’re trying to conform me to the status quo, or what already exists.

This reminds me of a Hollywood producer, who spoke to a graduating class in cinema, at the University of Southern California (USC), in Los Angeles, in the 1980s. She said “you will never make a classic if you do it like it has always been done.” She went on to say that up until Fred Astaire, the movie star dancer, dance had only been filmed showing a waist-up view. Astaire refused to do it that way, and that step away from conformity started the filming of full-body dance scenes.

The same is true for your life. If you do it the way it has always been done, you could find yourself down a dead rabbit trail, because you followed the group. You could also find yourself obese, sick, and on medication. Because too many people are driving into fast-food restaurants sucking up tons of carbohydrates, fat, and salt. That’s just one illustration of conformity. I’ll write more about personal development later, as it can affect your entire life.

My comments about career development and psychology tell you that I don’t support conformity. In the early 1950s, Dr. Carl Rogers, considered the most influential psychologist of the 20^th Century, tried to move psychology forward, breaking some of the conformity in the field, moving individuals toward trusting their own knowledge. However, his thoughts were relegated to a position of just another theory. In the 1960s Dr. David Tiedeman, a Harvard University professor, and a luminary in the field of career development, also tried to lead the career development field toward a vision for enhanced personal development, but he received the same trophy status as Rogers, as the field continued on its conformity path.

Now having said that I want to suggest that the leaders in both psychology and career development are doing what life is speaking to them. Therefore, in their mind they are doing it right and well. Hence, it all comes down to perception, as in what you believe and how you see the world. In this sense, no right and wrong exists, only DIFFERENT points to view. But a difference does exist.

Traditional psychology and career development are in no way holistic paradigms (belief systems). The traditional approach offers a lock-step set of protocols to choose from, but that comes from the science on which it is based, which for that group matches their practice and research. However, the LifePRocess theory and the LifeProcess Philosophy is based on the newer science, Quantum physics (principles useful in everyday life), and this allows you to play all over life. But it also holds you accountable for your perceptions. In other words, whatever you don’t like reflects your value system, it says little about what you’re commenting on. In other words, when you own your perceptions, you look at the object or person commented on as a way to learn more about yourself.

Further, when you live life-as-process you experience less stress, and this supports your immune system. Translated, you have less picky illnesses, colds and the like, because you don’t weigh your immune system down with too much stress. Hence, conformity can increase stress, whereas living life-as-process points toward less stress.

We’re all at different places in our life and perception, and the best we can do is work toward that which improves our over-all well-being.

I’m Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, owner of the NEW Careering Institute, Inc., and I welcome your comments and questions, just e-mail me: anna@life-is-career.com.

Perception: What We Think We Know

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Mon, 30 May 2011 15:43:00 GMT

WELCOME BACK

Miller-Tiedeman's LifeProcess Theory & Lifecareer Philosophy offers Quantum physics principles useful in everyday life. In addition, when Life is the big career, any topic is fair-game, because life direction is not just about work.
What we think we know

(C) Anna Miller-Tiedeman 2011
Permission granted for educational use.

Josh Billings, a humorist, reportedly said, “I believe when we stumble and fall, it’s not because our reasoning faculties have failed us. It because of what we know that just isn’t so.”

When I think of all the approaches to diet and nutrition, this quote frequently comes to mind. For instance, those who tout the high protein diet, the grapefruit diet, the high carbohydrate diet to name a few. Each of these approaches contains some truth, but alone they each leave something to be desired. We read the claims and frequently decide that it represents truth for us, even though the approach may not have anything to do with how the body really works. But the person writing has either a Ph.D. or an M. D., so we quickly conclude that he or she is correct. Unfortunately, we frequently feel better for a week or two, and then if we keep at it, we often feel worse.

I’m reminded of the health seminar I attended where the presenter told the story of seeing a woman from a large vegetarian community in the audience. He said to her, “Why are you here? You know I recommend some meat in the diet.” She replied, “Our community isn’t feeling well and I wanted to learn more.” This woman knew that at least for her vegetarian community, the notion they collectively shared wasn’t true in the long run, because too many were not feeling well.

George Washington would have lived longer if his doctors had not thought they were entirely correct to bleed him. Losing blood most likely weakened him to the point he didn’t survive. We now know that bleeding someone isn’t a good thing. His doctor knew something that just wasn’t true.

Think about the people who believe you have to buy a spray-can of Ant killer to exterminate an ant. They muck up their lungs and the lungs of those around them. Sure, they kill the ant, but they’ve also damaged their body. What they didn’t know is that you can quickly kill ants with glass cleaner, a much safer and cheaper product.

In the medical arena, I’m reminded of how easy it is to be hung up on a professional you’ve gotten to know. In the late 1990s, David (my husband) had a skin condition that needed immediate care. I called and our regular doctor couldn’t see us for at least two months. We needed a quicker appointment, so the receptionist asked if we wanted to see the new doctor. Immediately I thought “no,” then I decided to step back, build some new neurons in my brain, and do something different, like make an appointment with the new doctor. We got in within three days. The doctor was superb and outstanding, and I think better than our regular doctor.

I learned that had I not gone beyond what I thought I knew, I would not have met this wonderful doctor, nor would I have learned how limiting what I think I know actually is.

I had the same experience when a minister left a church we attended in Carlsbad, California. I thought he couldn’t be replaced, that his take on the scriptures was so superb. It turned out that I liked the new minister even better. She had a perspective I found very refreshing. In fact, those wonderful Christians managed to get rid of her a mere 6 months after arrival. That’s what those at the lower stages of personal development do. You might even think of it as professional bullying. In other words, “You don’t fit our Conforming paradigm (belief) system, therefore, you need to go.” Invented reality then kicks to provide a reason for the expulsion.

Moving on, I’ve learned that I like being with individuals who live beyond the Conforming stage of development, as they tend to be more present in the moment, they take more risks, and they language their thoughts more creatively. In taking responsibility for their perceptions they, rather naturally, commit more random acts of kindness.

So, these days, I let those winds of grace blow over me and carry me through those moments of hesitation and inappropriate determination. This helps me come into a more loving and forgiving place, a place where I don’t stumble and fall because I’ve failed to forgive myself for those times when I was less than I know I could or should have been. I want more of those moments where I am conscious of being the person I know I am.

This returns me to what Josh Billings so profoundly said, “I believe that when we stumble and fall, it’s not because our reasoning faculties have failed us, it’s because of what we know that just isn’t so.
I'm Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Director of the NEW Careering Institute, Inc., and I* welcome your comments and questions. anna@life-is-career.com.

Perception: Points to View Versus a Point of View

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Sun, 01 May 2011 16:25:00 GMT

Points to View Versus a Point of View
(C) Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Ph.D., 2011
Permission granted for educational use

In the book, Mr. God, This Is Anna, the little girl observed that God does not have a point of view, rather he has points to view. The new science backs this up by saying that it is all perception. In other words, millions of view points jockey for some kind of legitimacy in a culture strapped down by conformity. The American culture has as much difficulty with modernity (progress) as middle eastern cultures.

But moving on, my point of view has included a cooperative stance with life, because life has many mysteries. Those I don’t try to discern, I merely label them as such and move on. I have always loved brailleing, sensing, feeling, experimenting, and otherwise dancing all over life. I, therefore, didn’t concern myself with choosing a career. I intuitively knew that if I cooperated with the approaching forces, while assessing my current situation, I would find my right niche, at least for the moment. That has remained true.

My comments about career development and psychology tell you that I don’t support conformity. In the early 1950s, Dr. Carl Rogers, considered the most influential psychologist of the 20^th Century, tried to move psychology forward, breaking some of the conformity in the field, moving individuals toward trusting their own knowledge. (He wrote On Becoming a Person, a book worth reading.) However, his thoughts were relegated to a position of just another theory. In the 1960s Dr. David Tiedeman, a Harvard University professor, and a luminary in the field of career development, also tried to lead the career development field toward a vision for enhanced personal development, but he received the same trophy status as Rogers, as the field continued on its conformity path.

Now having said that I want to suggest that the current leaders in both psychology and career development are doing what life is speaking to them. Therefore, in their mind they are doing it right and well. Hence, it all comes down to perception, as in what you believe and how you see the world. In this sense, no right and wrong exists, only DIFFERENT points to view. But a difference does exist.

We’re all at different places in our lives and our perceptions continually shift. Therefore, the best we can do is work toward that which improves our over-all well-being. Further, adopting the points to view strategy rids the immune system of the judgment stress, and opens the way for a happier life. And couldn’t we all use a little more happiness?

I’m Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, owner of the NEW Careering Institute, Inc., and I welcome your comments and questions. e-mail: anna@life-is-career.com.

affects

Blog Questions answered

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 23:26:00 GMT

WELCOME BACK

Miller-Tiedeman's LifeProcess Theory & Lifecareer Philosophy offers Quantum physics principles useful in everyday life. In addition, when Life is the big career, any topic is fair-game, because life direction is not just about work.
Blog Questions & Answers:

About printing.

You can just print, or copy and paste it to your computer.
How to subscribe to my blog?

On the left, in the blog, a box says “Subscribe.” Just enter your e-mail address.
Write more often.

I write when the topic and time allows. My vision for the LifeProcess Theory & Lifecareer Philosophy is reduced stress, so my writing points in that direction, even though the topics vary. If you ask a question pertaining to the content, I will respond, as I like different points to view.
More info on Benson’s relaxation response.

Browse Benson and you’ll find videos where you can watch him speak about the relaxation response. For Benson’s books visit www.amazon.com, or see if Benson’s books are in your local library. If you wanted a short cut, browse his work on the web, then stop your life, sit down, close your eyes, and clear your mind for 15 or 20 minutes. That will do it. The research, as you know, found genetic expression change in eight weeks. It’s not just about starting meditation, it’s about establishing a habit.
Remember, meditation has moved out of alternative medicine into main-stream acceptance.

I would appreciate hearing about your meditation experience. I will blog about my meditation journey soon.

Relaxation Response and Scientific Proof

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Sun, 20 Feb 2011 22:50:00 GMT

Miller-Tiedeman's LifeProcess Theory & Lifecareer Philosophy offers
Quantum physics principles useful in your everyday life.
When Life is the big career, any topic is fair game, because life direction is not just about work.
Therefore, in this post, the topic is the latest meditation research.

Better Health and Life Direction In 5 to 20 Minutes a Day
© Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Ph.D., 2011
Permission granted for educational use

Meditation opens a space for new ideas, in addition to its health and healing aspects, so let's start with mindset, something most people see as empty and useless. However, recent research suggests that changing your mind can change your gene expression, which in turn changes your health. Easy? Well, not so fast. Changing your mind isn't as easy as changing shirts, but it’s worth taking a run at.

^{In career development, if you believe that career is only about job or profession, then connecting health to life direction doesn’t work, because your paradigm (belief) doesn’t include it. You could think about this as a complementarity approach: when you focus on one thing, you miss everything else, and this introduces both uncertainty and limited information. Driving is a great illustration. When we're preoccupied, we often miss an intended exit; and, in career development, we miss opportunities for the same reason.}

Break the train of your everyday thinking by words like love, peace, God, or words from the Lord’s prayer, shalom, ohm, hail Mary, or interrupt your day with a run, or whatever you do. Some people prefer to sit for 5 minutes each day and clear their mind. Others find this meditative state in gardening. If you start thinking during your time out, just say, “Next,” or whatever word will send the thought on.
Optimum time is 15 to 20 minutes, but five minutes will do.
You can practice this meditative state anywhere: an airport, supermarket, hair dresser, and even more creative places.
Daily practice for at least 8 weeks will change your physiology (Scientific proof on this).

I conclude with this principle: Explanation never convinced anyone of anything.

As a gardener, I always have hope a seed will grow. Someday, when you’re ready to stop your life for a few minutes a day, I hope you will remember having read this article. .

I'm Dr. Anna Miller-Tiedeman, Director of the New Careering Institute, Inc., and I welcome your comments and questions. anna@life-is-career.com.

Introduction to Lifecareer(R)/New Careering

Anna Miller Tiedeman Ph D — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 17:55:00 GMT

What in the world is Lifecareer(R)? It's about living life as process. That is my (Miller-Tiedeman) major question when I talk with groups. So, what is process? Process is a four-letter word: LIFE. It is what happens each minute, so by being in life, you're in your own life process which is encrypted (coded) with information specific to you. It's like your personal computer in a way, it holds specific to you.
When you Lifecareer(R) you merely cooperate with the approaching forces iin your life making the best decision possible (not worrying about getting it right) because if it goes "left" (what some call "wrong," ) you will get this marvelous opportunity to make another and another and another decision until you arrive at some satisfaction.

Now how much easier can it get? And your big payoff is "less stress" which enhances your immune system. When you work against life, you effectively "donate" your immune system because not cooperating with life is stressful and stress depresses the immune system. It usually takes several months to start recognizing when you're "donating;" that is what we call "awareness." To visit my website: www.life-is-career.com.